La Vie Boheme

So, I know I posted just yesterday about loneliness, but I suppose this is in the same vein. A little more positive.

I was out at a winery with my mom and her work friends, and I was mostly quiet the whole time. That's just how I am, I only contribute to a conversation if I have something meaningful to say. One of the women there was in a similar boat, and the few times she did speak, she mostly was weighing in on some problems she'd been having with her hand the past few years... Car accident, medical stuff, etc. Basically she has a chronic condition.

Anyway... the way she was talking about certain things, it made it very obvious to me that she was depressed and isolated. Some of her comments were making my mother and her other friend uncomfortable, but I knew exactly what she was talking about. I know what it's like for people to get frustrated and uncomfortable with something they don't understand, whether that's a disorder of the mind or the body. I know that once you're depressed, people stop trying to hang out with you. They don't reach out to you. So you isolate yourself even more.

I know how upsetting it is for people who love you but who don't understand to talk about shit they don't know anything about, to tell you what you should be doing and getting angry with you for something totally out of your control.

I don't have strokes, I don't have a chronic physical disability. I do have bipolar disorder, though, and it went untreated for a lot of years. But one thing I have that this sweet lady does not is people.

I cannot stress enough the importance of finding your people... I find my people in communities across the board, all online - nerdy and political communities on tumblr, spankos on various platforms, writers and artists on FFN and deviantArt. Growing up in the age of technology has provided me with this invaluable resource and the three people I am closest to on this earth live nowhere near me... Yet I feel totally supported by them. I love them dearly. They're My People. And I really hope I can help this sweet lady on her way to finding her own people, and maybe I can be one of her people.

-Z